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Tears, Tools, and Treasure
The hardest part of losing my son is living in the “after.” Suicide divided my life into before and after. I replay our final conversations. I wrestled with guilt. I questioned God. I lived in a fog of disbelief, moving through days that felt heavy and unreal.
Yet what has sustained me is not trying to conquer grief, but learning to walk with it.
I rediscovered faith. His death by suicide still leaves me grappling with how someone so gentle and creative could suffer so deeply
Chano Itwaru
Feb 265 min read


Love, Advent, Loss and Christmas: Holding on to What Matters
Advent becomes the spiritual framework for this slower, more intentional season. Rather than skipping ahead to joy, Advent asks for waiting,sitting with longing, expectation, and hope. This reflects on how the Christian story itself unfolds this way: before celebration, there was darkness; before joy, there was waiting; before the birth of Christ, there was love preparing to arrive. Christmas, at its core, is not about perfection or excess but about God choosing closeness,ent
Chano Itwaru
Dec 22, 20255 min read


The 3 Cs of Grief - Challenge, Change, and Connections
Grief is the intense sadness arising from tragic events, such as death or job loss. The word " grief " originates from the Latin "gravare,"
Chano Itwaru
Apr 5, 20254 min read
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