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Tears, Tools, and Treasure
The hardest part of losing my son is living in the “after.” Suicide divided my life into before and after. I replay our final conversations. I wrestled with guilt. I questioned God. I lived in a fog of disbelief, moving through days that felt heavy and unreal.
Yet what has sustained me is not trying to conquer grief, but learning to walk with it.
I rediscovered faith. His death by suicide still leaves me grappling with how someone so gentle and creative could suffer so deeply
Chano Itwaru
Feb 265 min read


Grief Rearranges you: Reflections on Two Funerals
And in both, God was there — not explaining, not fixing, but holding me and whispering that He remains my refuge and strength, my ever-present help in every season. Psalm 23 comforted me then, and it comforts me still. I now offer that same comfort to my sister-in-law.
When you attend a funeral, remember that you are stepping onto sacred ground. The person in the front row is not only burying someone they love; they are also burying their life. Grief is not always loud. Somet
Chano Itwaru
Feb 195 min read


Nice Isn’t the Same as Kind: Grief Lessons
After my son Kevin died by suicide, I learned that niceness may acknowledge loss, but true kindness stays, remembers, and walks beside those who grieve, offering presence, listening, and unwavering love. Kindness respects that love continues. It allows stories to be told again and again. It knows that remembering is not dwelling, and that speaking a loved one’s name is not reopening a wound. It is honoring a life.
Chano Itwaru
Feb 106 min read
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