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The Silence Around Grief
Grief invites us to reflect deeply, but it does not always give us the words to express what lives within our hearts. I hope my story resonates with those feeling similar silence or numbness, reminding us we're not alone in this journey. or grieving parents, hearing our child’s name is often a gift. It tells us that others still see the person we continue to love. Kevin’s death did not erase the thirty-three years he lived on this earth. It did not erase his kindness, creativ
Chano Itwaru
5 days ago4 min read


Lessons About Grief and Moving Forward: What Cambodia Taught Me About Living After Trauma
This piece is a deeply personal reflection on grief, resilience, and what it means to keep living after profound loss. Inspired by a long-awaited journey to Cambodia, it explores the emotional and spiritual impact of visiting a country marked by unimaginable history, including the legacy of the Khmer Rouge regime. What began as a postponed trip due to COVID-19 became something far more meaningful—a journey intertwined with memory, faith, and the loss of a beloved son.
Chano Itwaru
Apr 275 min read


Who Am I Now After Losing My Son?
There is a quiet distance between who I once was and who I am becoming, a space shaped by love, loss, and a deeper awareness I did not carry
Chano Itwaru
Apr 155 min read


Finding Comfort in Suffering: How Faith Brings Hope in Grief
I didn’t truly grasp the complexity of suffering until I lost my beloved son, Kevin. Before his passing, I experienced pain like many others—disappointments, heartaches, and challenging times. Yet the kind of suffering that burrows deep into your soul and reshapes your view of the world was entirely foreign to me. Suffering, in its essence, transcends mere pain. It embodies the profound emotional, mental, or spiritual distress that weighs heavily on our hearts when something
Chano Itwaru
Mar 186 min read


Grief Rearranges you: Reflections on Two Funerals
And in both, God was there — not explaining, not fixing, but holding me and whispering that He remains my refuge and strength, my ever-present help in every season. Psalm 23 comforted me then, and it comforts me still. I now offer that same comfort to my sister-in-law.
When you attend a funeral, remember that you are stepping onto sacred ground. The person in the front row is not only burying someone they love; they are also burying their life. Grief is not always loud. Somet
Chano Itwaru
Feb 195 min read


Nice Isn’t the Same as Kind: Grief Lessons
After my son Kevin died by suicide, I learned that niceness may acknowledge loss, but true kindness stays, remembers, and walks beside those who grieve, offering presence, listening, and unwavering love. Kindness respects that love continues. It allows stories to be told again and again. It knows that remembering is not dwelling, and that speaking a loved one’s name is not reopening a wound. It is honoring a life.
Chano Itwaru
Feb 106 min read


Dichotomy of Past and Present: Walking the Roads of Memory and Grace
Some days, the emptiness feels overwhelming. I trust God, yet I remain human. I grieve. I long for what might have been. I know death does not have the final word and that Jesus conquered the grave, but faith does not erase the ache. It gives me permission to bring my brokenness honestly before God. Scripture reminds me, “See, I am doing a new thing; now it springs up, do you not perceive it?” (Isaiah 43:19). I hold onto that promise, even when I cannot yet see the new thing
Chano Itwaru
Feb 34 min read


The Gift of Children: A Mother’s Reflection
Motherhood taught me patience I did not know I had. It invited me to notice beauty in small, ordinary moments, a tiny hand holding mine, a laugh that could fill an entire room. It shaped me with humility and showed me how deeply a heart can stretch when rooted in love.
Now, decades later, my firstborn is a mother herself to two beautiful little girls. They have been, and continue to be, sources of deep joy and steady light, especially on days when life and grief feel overwhel
Chano Itwaru
Jan 133 min read
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